Monday 23 February 2015
Sunday 15 February 2015
Bridge Street Brewery: Saturday evening, 10 January 2015
Since the Tequila Spidermen concept was born at the Bridge Street Brewery, it only seems appropriate that the first ever review on this blog is of that very establishment. This will see the five of us catapulted from the mediocrity and drudgery of our nine-to-five jobs, to enthralling lives filled with books deals, Tequila Spidermen merchandising and possibly a reality TV show. So, without further ado or gilding of the lily … here goes.
The Jester:
Established in 2011 by Lex Mitchell, a pioneer of microbrewery in South Africa, the Bridge Street Brewery has fast become a firm favourite with locals and tourists alike. Set on the banks of the Baakens River – more of a stream these days – this bistro and microbrewery offers you a relaxed setting with views of Fort Frederick and the valley that once saw ships sailing through it.
To be honest, the night we popped in for a lemonade or two and a bite to eat, the Spidermen were unusually sober and subdued – that in itself was both interesting and weird. We didn’t come across anyone else befitting of this category on this occasion, but one thing for sure is that the BSB always has a great mix of people – young and old, chic and shabby, rich and people like me (poor). I like the relaxed vibe and the buzz that makes for an out-of-the-ordinary experience.
The Swordmaster:
Pizza: Very good (previous visits) – good thin crust pizzas – very tasty – 8 lekkerness
Fillet: Was nicely cooked and reasonable on the taste buds, but not outstanding; just ok. Previously I had a steak which was ok but not memorable – 3 lekkerness
Calamari: Soft and cooked to a tee. Delicious – 8 lekkerness
Beer: Good selection of bottled beer and some very good craft beers. I like the Celtic Cross Premium Pilsner – 8 lekkerness
Atmosphere: I really enjoy the BSB, particularly the outdoor area – fresh, open-air seating with a good view down the valley. They often have live music, which is never too loud, that adds to a fun atmosphere. BSB is a great place for meeting new people and enjoying an afternoon or evening with friends. There are often groups of girls meeting for an evening out with their friends in a safe environment – also plenty of groups of guys. This pub is usually well-attended by a fairly upmarket crowd of all ages – 8 lekkerness
BSB has a small undercover function area suitable for birthday parties and small office functions or promotions.
Parking: The parking lot is small and usually full, so you will often have to park on the street or the vacant lot next door. A definite area of improvement required – 4 lekkerness
Overall: By PE standards it is an 8, by SA standards it is a 6 lekkerness.
The Hangman:
Pros: The BSB has yet to disappoint in terms of food and quality of beer. There’s enough variety to keep any palate happy, and its pricing-to-value-for-money ratio could well be the benchmark for the city. I had the house burger and found it really satisfying and interesting enough to justify its R60.00 plus cost. I got through three varieties of the house-brewed beers:
· Boar’s Head Best Bitter – an excellent all-rounder
· Celtic Cross Premium – a pilsner that didn’t float my boat
· Black Dragon Double Chocolate Stout– with a great richness and lasting aftertaste, it was probably my favourite for the evening
Cons: Its popularity is probably its Achilles heel. While the service is good, it does take an effort to get served at times. You’re left feeling that the front of house is understaffed.
The Scribe:
You know that feeling when you’re not quite sure which door will lead you to the throne room and which to the dungeons? Thanks to almost life-sized girl and guy signage on their doors, you’ll have no trouble finding your throne at the Bridge Street Brewery. The ladies is clean and tidy, with a generous stock of good-quality loo roll, as well as – unusually, I think – a toilet brush and can of air-freshener. Although there are only two cubicles and one wash basin, based on past experience on busier evenings, this hasn’t resulted in the standard queue of cross-legged women. Overall the venue and staff are clean and neat – no tacky tabletops, gunky glasses or crusty cutlery. Overall lekkerness is an 8.
Tequila Spidermen - The Beginning
Sometimes the best ideas come from modest beginnings. The Tequila Spidermen came about after an evening spent with friends at the Bridge Street Brewery after having watched the Boks play the All Blacks (or Wallabies or the Argentinean Los Pumas). There happened to be a tequila promotion on, and the Swordmaster needed no encouragement to order a round, pick a lucky card and win a prize. The prize, a Spiderman-like mask adorned in woodcut-style print, became the icon – and chief photobomb prop – for the group. This was the catalyst to an evening of madness and the creation of the Tequila Spidermen.
The idea of the blog is to provide reviews of the various establishments that we go to, with each of us delegated to appraise particular elements based on our ‘expertise’. We score each of the elements out of ten on the Spidermen scale of lekkerness, with one being, ’Really kak‘, and ten being, ’Take bail money’.
Let me introduce you to the blog’s five contributors – the original Tequila Spidermen:
The Hangman: With an IQ higher than Einstein and Stephen Hawkins combined (especially when drunk and slouched on a bar chair), as well as a palate trained especially for the tasting of Craft Beer, Hangman is the best person in the group to review the establishment on value for money as well as the local brew, crafted or otherwise.
The Scribe: She is probably the most level-headed and mild-mannered of the group, but give her just one tequila and it’s, ’I am in the mood to party!’ The task of reviewing the establishments’ cleanliness and whatever else floats her goat is in her capable hands.
The Baroness: A stickler for quality, and an experienced pub-crawler, Baroness is the perfect person to rate venues on their service levels (or lack thereof). She’ll also keep an eye on the bail money.
The Swordmaster: What we can say about him is that he is able to talk to any woman – married or single; young or old – and get them to take off their tops. Entertainment is his portfolio; he’ll tell you what to expect from the music (live or otherwise), to the size of big screens for sports events, as well as the availability of single women. We’ve also asked him to rate the food and availability of tequila.
The Jester: I have been tasked to write about the interesting or weird characters that we come across, and to learn about the establishments’ histories. The reason for the former is probably to get me to come out of my shell – since I am the quietest one in the group, it was thought that I might benefit from being forced to speak to other people.
We do not profess to be able to write as well as Deon Meyer, Patricia Cornwell, Naas Botha or Enid Blyton – that is not what this is about. What you will get from the blog is an honest, no-nonsense, down-to-earth, unsponsored, uncensored and colourful review of the establishments that we have ended up at. Another certainty is that the blog will evolve over time and, like any good wine, mature as we review more establishments and become more proficient at imparting the stories behind the venues. We hope you enjoy.
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